Ah, love. The muse of poets and writers and composers. The inspiration of many artists and musicians. However, do we really know what love and romance are? Do you already know what makes for a good relationship with your man? The problem with love and romance is that it sometimes blinds us, making us focus on them rather than looking for something real and tangible. Thus, we concoct many false romance notions that may mess up with our chances at finding someone great to be with. If you want to be careful, watch out for this particular false romantic notion.
False romantic notion: You don't have to find love. It would find you.?
Okay, seriously. Everyone says this. Your friends tell you this, your office mates, the dude you meet on the street, even tarot cards and fortune cookies. Does this mean that it is true? Well, NO.
If you think that love finds you when you don't make an effort to find it, then you have to do some re-thinking. Of course, there are some cases that may attest that, yes, this is true. But apart from those exceptions, the rest of the singles in this world, have to make an effort to find their partners.
People may tell you that you shouldn't have to look for love because it will find you. Most of the time, however, the people that say this are moping around in loneliness or muttering against online dating sites, only a couple of weeks before they met the person that they are going to get married to. Of course, there would come a time that we get discouraged from dating, especially if we just got out of a relationship and suffering from a bad break-up. If you feel that you need some time-out from dating to do some soul-searching or for some "alone" ME time, then by all means do take all the time that you need.
But don't ever lose hope that you will find love again.
Don't allow yourself to believe that you have to stop trying to find love in order to find it.
Look, even the Bible says, "Seek and you shall find;" it does NOT say, "Wait for that thing to find you instead," now does it?
Of course, that person that you are bound to connect with will be with you someday, regardless of whatever force is behind your union. But they won't be able to find you and you them, if you give up looking and just stay inside your room waiting for the world to pass by and miraculously hand you your partner. How many people have stopped looking for the chance to be together with someone amazing, someone that could have been a prospective partner, just because they "stopped looking" and are simply just waiting there for Mr. or Miss Right? Lots.
Take a lesson from a very good friend of mine. He had gone through a very painful break-up with his girlfriend. Of course, naturally, he was pretty much broken up about it. He was already fighting against a pessimistic view on dating in general, even before he met that certain girlfriend. After almost a month of doing nothing but mope, sulk, and feel bad, he suddenly woke up and said that no, he isn't giving up on love and that he'll find the woman that he will marry himself. It would have been so easy for him to just stay miserable and not date again for a while because of his hurt and pain. Instead, he decided to take a positive attitude, took destiny into his own hands and did something about it. He said that whatever had happened to him in the past is not a reason for him not to find an amazing woman who could love him and he could love back. After signing up in an online dating site of his choice, he found himself exchanging messages and chatting with a female online dater just a few days later. A month after, they met up. And now, they are married and are happy with each other.
You see? Love doesn't find you. You have to find it. Not necessarily date everyone that comes your way. But you must take a positive view on dating and believe in the fact that you can find your special someone if you just seek them well.
This article is brought to you by Relationships Advice Blog.
No comments:
Post a Comment