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How to Get Your Ex Back When You Have Made Some Mistakes
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Dating Advice for Men - Three Mistakes of Inexperience
How To Get Your Ex Back If You Need A Helping Hand
Ending the Journey of Hurt and Pain
Steps To Surviving A Bad Break-Up
Online Dating Tips: Two Killer Secrets of a Winning Profile
Do Women Really Want Nice Guys?
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Letting the 'Young Man' Go
Is It Possible To Have An Honest Relationship With No Lies Or Secrets?
What To Do After a Relationship Ends
Great Tips On How to Make Your Relationship Work
Watch Out for Desperate Chinese Women
Monday, February 25, 2013
How to Approach An Ex Girlfriend - 3 Tips That Will Help You Get Her Back
Sunday, February 24, 2013
The Ultimate 1st Date
Something that stirs all the senses: Food
My life revolves around food, and not in some sick sort of way. I am not obese, but I like to cook and I love to eat, and the ambiance, of a great restaurant. A chef once told me he loves knowing he"is setting up the evening for lovers to make love after they eat his food."
That chef had a bit of an ego, but he was right, nonetheless. A great 1st date should entice the senses. People are at their best when a good atmosphere is invoked with food. Look at all the great movies: Like Water for Chocolate, Babette's Feast, Chocolate... the list goes on and on. We like our food, but we never really say it quite enough: food is an aphrodisiac, and not just oysters. Food and eating, and tasting, and smacking our lips around, and watching our date eat, and enjoy. Think about that. Food being broken down with our canines, incisors, ewww... so enticing... but this is our primal nature. So, for good God's sake, make a 1st date, women, men, who ever is the initiator of the date, it is up to you to make it powerful and use the senses to make memories because the olfactory nerves or what's going to make her/him remember you. A medical study, cited as Herz and Engen, 1996 states: "Only two synapses separates the olfactory nerves from the Hippocampus, which has implicated in memory... indeed this is why odor-evoked memories are unusually emotionally potent."
So, what's effecting your date is not so much what your wearing, she's not tasting and chewing that (or maybe if your lucky she is), she is tasting and smelling the drink and food, and the music is playing, ahhh... yes, the rhythm is going along with the food. She is remembering this while you watch her eyes glint and shine, and her mouth salivate... you are evoking all the senses to come and play... and the great complicated mind is creating a memory with smell, her brain praises you and gleans for more. She is remembering you right now... and this memory will long to make more similar memories. Science is a tricky little thing, because you forget about it, but it is always at the root of why we date in the first place, we are animals with instincts and are made up of chemicals and pheromones that respond to our environment, like a cat hunting its prey.
The New Pheromone Trend in Dating
On a larger scale, there's a new way to find a date, purely through smell. Pheromone parties are being hosted in Los Angeles and bigger cities, getting singles to connect to their dates, purely through smell. Ahh... if the world only was that barbaric still. We'd women be clubbed, and the men, oh, the men, wouldn't be complaining much because they'd still be grunting, not talking. Evolution has provided us with details on why women and men are attracted to pheromones in choosing their mates, study show its because it prevents inbreeding, and choosing a mate who is ovulating. However, we are (hopefully) intellectually able to curb this more animalistic style of just hopping on a person who happens to just be dropping an egg. The parties that are becoming a hit in the cities, derived from a web developer named Judith Prays, who remembered a guy's smell, but not him. Mhmmm... so Prays resorted to a kind of smell whats in the bag kind of thing and found that couples were hitting it off. But mostly couples were hitting it off, because they had a funny, great icebreaker. Two people smelling dirty shirts and underwear? Doesn't get more olfactory binding than that!
Of course this is all based on an article that I just read in the Huffington Post, and have yet to do a laundry smelling party myself. However, as a chef, who is not setting the stage "for people to make love" as my chef friend said, I am more interested in creating the memory of taste and smell that evokes a certain remembrance of time, that you want to go back to. Nostalgia. I have nostalgia for the meals and wine I have partook, and the company that brought me there. It's also not just the food, taste, or smell; the brain also needs another intellectual resource to bind the memory into place. This is how we involved. We need a counterpart, a feeling of intense warmness and safe being, where one in the midst's of smelling dirty laundry or eating Brie with champagne, must feel and remember like it was home, and not dangerous. Comfort food if you will for the senses. This I believe leads to the next date...
What if I got ten bucks?
If you have ten bucks, it's picnic time and the gods will save you with pine and eucalyptus. Many people feel down trodden about the whole picnic, outdoors thing. There's nothing more invigorating than fresh air, and once again, the olfactory nerves will remember the surrounds stronger when a person is in a natural setting, surrounded by natural smells. You want the person to remember you; a picnic with fresh fruit is all you need. Sprinkle a little Sugar on those strawberries before you go, the sugar induces the already natural sweetness in the strawberry juices. Everything, big and small matters. Get creative dating, the world is filled with smells, including, hopefully the most enticing one of all, your own.
Saturday, February 23, 2013
How to End an Informal Email in Online Dating
Do You Love an Alcoholic?
Friday, February 22, 2013
Tips on How to Text a Girl
How to Choose Between Two Men
Online Dating With Love on Top - How to Find True Love
Thursday, February 21, 2013
How Do I Get Back With My Boyfriend - 3 Tips For Winning Him Back
The Watch Man
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Improving Your Online Dating Profile
More Men Are Attracted To You Than You Think - Their Body Language Prove It
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Conflict Resolution Training: Do You Want to Know a Secret? Listen
How To Know If A Girl Likes You - Tips You Must Know
How To Text a Girl - Real Texting Examples
Tips To Survive A Breakup: Journal Writing
Is Online Dating the Best Method for Shy Singles?
How to Stop Workplace Bullying
Free Dating Sites: Best Is Now Online
Experiencing Hurt in Healing Ways
Being hurt these days has a whole new world of meaning compared to being hurt before I was saved. Now I experience pain in being hurt without the disabling fear. I am still hurt, but the ferocity of my feelings against the source of my hurt is quelled completely. This is a miracle of God; to experience the truth of hurt, yet retain the perspective to be able to see whilst feeling; to retain conscious logic whilst reeling in some sense of despair; to maintain hope when the situation's joy has evaporated.
Experiencing hurt in healing ways is being connected with our sorrow, not running from it. When we connect to truth we also run to God.
Experiencing hurt in healing ways is a commitment of truth upon the protection of God; that the Lord has meaning and purpose in all things - having faith in that.
When we experience hurt in healing ways we are gifted the perspective that stops the tennis-match rally that would otherwise repeat the hurt again and again. We learn to absorb the hurt. We learn that grace is more than sufficient. We understand the copious power of God to transform hurt, in the moment's instant, into enough healing that we would not react in our hurt.
Experiencing hurt in healing ways is the process of surrender before God, that nothing is more important than that. And whilst it may seem a betrayal of our purposes, we know we must let go if God is to work in us and in the situation.
From the moment of hurt, through the ensuing days, we are blessed with more and more perspective. What started out as faith, to surrender our hurt to the only One who could help, has now redeemed good spiritual sense; we see plainly the blessing having not reacted.
Hurt is an abstract concept. Though we all get hurt, our hurt resonates as an echo from our very distant pasts. The inner child remains hurt. And the only one who can placate the child is God. We are God's children; each and every one of us.
But we can be disconnected from the pain within the hurt that causes our reaction when we approach truth; when we connect with God. Just understanding the processes of the inner child, that we all have, is valuable knowledge.
***
Experiencing hurt in healing ways is the help we need from God, even in the moment of hurt. With God there is perspective despite the pain; patience despite the anger; and sense enough not to react. With each day comes more perspective.
© 2013 S. J. Wickham.
Thursday, February 14, 2013
The World Of Online Dating Decoded
There is no question that for a great number of men, online dating has as many challenges as dating face to face has. Which begs the question: Why are some men so successful at online dating while others would do well to even consider it a dismal failure? If you're interested in knowing how to get more dates with online dating, the reality is that it's not very hard. With some very simple tips you can improve your profile, learn some tricks to present yourself in a better light and have more success when it comes to online dating.
The first thing you want to look at is your profile. Your profile is your first impression. You're going to want to convey your personality in a way that is comprehensive and the way that women understand who you are, but you'll also want to be brief about it; four brief sentences is the most you want to use. This can present a challenge to demonstrate your best self in such a restrictive amount of words, but by taking some time to be descriptive yet brief, positions you to have a much more appealing profile to women who would potentially view it.
Secondly, showing off your positive qualities is important but you also want to mind the details. When improving your profile remember to use proper spelling and grammar. Showing off your positive side and undercutting it with embarrassing and sometimes humorous grammatical errors and spelling mistakes is not the image you want project.
Lastly, fix your profile picture. While you want to remain true to who you are, you want to put your best foot forward. If you have an old out of focus picture or perhaps a picture of you in various states of disrepair, you want to make sure that you change that picture to something that is a better representation of you and something that women would be interested in. You also may want to reinforce the second point by adding pictures that show you doing fun things in your life. A fun cool picture that makes people smile can go a long way in showing what kind of person you are.
These are simple and easy to follow tips that can help you if you're struggling with online dating. Your profile is your first impression and you want to make sure that it's as good as you can possibly make it. By using proper photographs, being as detailed and brief as possible and by using proper spelling and grammar, you can change your fortunes in online dating!
Should You Fix Things With Your Boyfriend or Not?
When people are in love, they tend to feel like the whole world ahead of them is bright and full of rainbows. Yes, being in love is definitely a great feeling, but what if it feels like your boyfriend is drifting away from you? What if you aren't sure if you really care about each other or not? Here are some signs that you should try to fix things with your boyfriend before completely giving up on your love:
1. He always remembers the little things.
It is one thing for a guy to remember the important dates in your life, like your anniversary and your birthday, but it would also be vital for him to remember the little things from your past conversations to prove that he really listens to you and has an interest in your life. If he does this, then you might want to consider learning how to fix things with your boyfriend.
2. You always feel comfortable around him.
Do you feel relaxed whenever you are with your boyfriend or do you always feel the need to impress him despite all of the time that you have already been together? If you feel incredibly at ease around your boyfriend, then your relationship might have a lot of staying power and you might want to fix things with your boyfriend because of it.
3. You have no trouble opening up to each other.
If you can survive having long talks with your boyfriend without wanting to rip your hair out, then you already have a deep connection that could last a long time and would be worth saving overall.
4. He makes you feel secure.
Although this might sound materialistic, it would be absolutely vital for your boyfriend to make you feel financially secure. Of course, emotional security would be just as important, though, so make sure your boyfriend fits the bill on both counts before making your decision.
5. You always feel good around him.
If your boyfriend constantly makes an effort to keep the love alive in your relationship and if you always feel excited whenever you know that you will see him next, then you should definitely fix things with your boyfriend. This would hold especially true if he doesn't fail to make you breakfast or buy you flowers when you least expect it, just because he knows it will make you feel good about yourself.
Surviving A Break Up - First Love Heartbreaks
How to Get a Date-Mindset
Why Valentines Day Is Overrated
The Dangers of Positive Thinking! How Looking on the Bright Side Can Keep You in the Dark!
Wednesday, February 13, 2013
How to Talk to Pretty Women - 3 Tips for Making Conversation With Attractive Females
Does the very thought of trying to talk to pretty women make you feel a little bit nervous? Are you the kind of guy who wants to be able to approach attractive females, but for some reason, you always seem to find a reason not to? Do you want that to change? It's pretty common for men to find that when it comes to talking to a pretty woman, they start to get a little bit nervous and they might even feel like their mind goes blank and they don't really know what to say. However, you don't have to feel that way forever.
Here are some tips that will help you out if you want to be able to talk to pretty women:
1. Don't make the mistake of just talking about how pretty she is.
I've seen this happen quite a bit. A guy actually gets up the nerve to talk to a good looking woman and what does he do? He keeps finding ways to tell her that he thinks that she is pretty. While it is perfectly fine to give her a compliment about her looks, going on and on about it usually doesn't do much at all as far as making her feel attracted to you.
2. You need to be able to make eye contact with her.
Some guys just can't do this and it ends up working against them. Just because she is good looking, it doesn't mean that you shouldn't be able to make eye contact with her while talking to her. If you are not able to do this, it can easily give her a bad impression of you and you obviously don't want to do that. Look her in the eyes, hold the eye contact for a little bit. Don't stare, though.
3. Talk about things that are going to keep her talking to you.
One of the best ways to do this is to ask open ended questions about things that really interest her. With open ended questions, you don't end up with just yes and no answers. And as long as you are asking about things that really interest her, she is going to want to keep talking to you. The trick, though, is not to ask too many questions because that can end up seeming like you are grilling her for answers and that doesn't make for a good impression.
This article is sponsored by real estate news.
How to Deal With Breaking Up With Your Girlfriend If You Want Her Back - 3 Mistakes to Avoid
It's really a true statement to say that how you deal with breaking up with your girlfriend will have a huge impact on whether or not you and her wind up getting back together or you wind up staying broken up. There are common mistakes that guys make in this kind of a situation that you really want to avoid at all costs if you can and knowing what those mistakes are and being diligent about actually avoiding making them is key if you want to end up reconciling with her.
What are those three mistakes?
1. Letting yourself panic about the break up.
You may not want to admit to your buddies that you are feeling a little bit of panic about the break up, but it is a natural first reaction. You are going to think about the worst case scenario and the possibility that you might not be able to win her back. However, you have to control that inclination to panic about the break up as much as possible. No one makes good decisions about what to do when they are in that frame of mind.
2. Allowing other people to tell you what you need to do.
When it comes to break ups, it seems like just about everyone you know is going to tell you what you need to do. You'll have those friends that tell you that you need to just forget about her, that she isn't really worth it. You'll have those friends who will tell you that you need to suck up to your ex girlfriend because that's the real trick to being able to get her back. However, you want to be careful about allowing people to tell you what you need to do because in all reality, they are not you. They don't have to live with the reality of the break up like you do.
3. Thinking that your ex girlfriend is the only possible woman you can be happy with.
When you feel like your ex girlfriend is the only woman that you can find happiness with, you are going to feel desperate to win her back. Of course, you should already know that desperation doesn't really tend to be the best state of being for making a good impression on an ex girlfriend. Realize that as good as she might be, there is the possibility that another woman might be just as good to be with.
This article is sponsored by free dating site.
Tuesday, February 12, 2013
Why Is It That Hard To Let Go After A Breakup?
No matter, how many times you and your man fight, when the time comes for you to end the relationship, you feel as though you have lost a part of you. It is difficult to cope with this situation, and the painful inner conflict that your heart is going through makes it even worse. Your brain tries in vain to convince your heart that there was a good reason for the breakup, and it is time to look ahead and forget the past. But, your heart turns a blind eye to all the good reasons, and only cries for a reunion with your other half.
At this stage, the burning question "is it worth trying to get my ex-boyfriend back?" Never leaves you in peace. However, to make your task easy answering that question, you need to look at some key points. The moment you become able to evaluate the relationship, and see clearly what you want for your future, it will be easy for you to make the right decision whether getting your ex back is the best step to perform.
In your attempt, to make a clear choice without an ounce of regret of whether or not to get your ex back, you should honestly point out what caused the relationship to derail in the first place. When we look at things long enough we can see things that escaped us at first glance; along the same vein when you look at your relationship after the breakup you are bound to identify, without any difficulty, what led you and your ex to end up apart from each other.
Do you and your ex fight consistently? If that's the case, then consider another way to handle the problems in the relationship without resorting to fight. Communication in this case is the best choice to adapt. Communication not only solves the problems within the relationship, but also it nurtures a deep feeling of intimacy within the couple.
If the reason behind the breakup was that your boyfriend cheated on you, then you need to be wary of giving him another chance to hurt you again. He did it once and he can do it again. Even though he may be showing his regret and offering his fidelity all over again, don't jump too quickly into the conclusion of reuniting with him again. Let the time show you how far he is honest about his claims because actions speak louder than words.
This article is sponsored by technology.
Staying Centered in Conflict
Angela writes:
"I avoid conflict as much as possible because I cannot handle the anxiety it produces in me, as if I am going to die, even when I am in the presence of other people that are in conflict. I am aware that I abandon myself many times because I do not stand or fight for what I believe is right for me. I know we are going to encounter conflict in our daily life, it is part of it and I do not want to keep on feeling small at the presence of conflict. I want to be able to speak my truth, ask for what I need or stand for what I believe is right. How can I transform this, that is, how can I handle the anxiety and approach conflict in a more centered way?"
I completely understand what Angela experiences, as I used to feel the same anxiety, feeling like I was going to die. It took me many years to understand what I needed to do in conflict to no longer fear it.
I used to believe as Angela believes - that I had to learn to stand up, speak my truth, and fight for what I wanted or believed was right for me. I spent years learning to 'fight fair' and not crumble in the face of conflict. But even with all that, I was still scared of it.
Now I know why. Now I no longer fear conflict.
Angela, imagine that you have a little girl and someone verbally attacks her, or others are fighting in her presence. You have two choices:
- You can stand up for her, speaking your truth or trying to get the others to stop fighting, or
- You can turn to her, embrace her with understanding and compassion, and let her know that she is not alone - that you are here and your wise higher self is here. You can let her know that whatever is going on is not about her, so that she doesn't take another's unloving behavior personally. If possible, you can leave the situation. If you can't leave, you can continue to focus on her rather than on the others, making sure that she doesn't feel alone, and that she feels comforted.
If you take the first choice, she will still feel alone and scared. It won't do any good at all to speak up for her or try to get others to stop. When people are upset, they are not open to learning, so whatever you say to them falls on deaf ears. You cannot get others to see you or hear you when they are upset or angry.
If you take the second choice, she will feel safe, knowing that you, as a loving Adult, are managing the situation and staying connected to her.
Angela, this is exactly what needs to happen on the inner level. The time to speak your truth and stand up for yourself is NOT in the moment of conflict. This is something you can do later, if you and the other or others are open to learning. Only when someone is open to learning will he or she hear you and want to understand.
When you take the second choice with yourself, you are staying connected with yourself rather than abandoning yourself. This is what your inner child needs from you to not feel scared. As you stated in your question, it is the self-abandonment that creates the terror, but you are confused regarding what is self-abandonment. You are still abandoning yourself when you enter the fray, fighting for what you want.
The only way you are not abandoning yourself in conflict is when you stay lovingly connected with yourself and your spiritual guidance, taking loving care of your own feelings. If you practice this, you will not only find that your fear goes away, but you will discover that you feel extremely empowered. This empowerment will help you know if and how to deal effectively with any others involved in the conflict, instead of reacting from a triggered position.
My Girlfriend Is Boring - 3 Things That This Might Suggest
Have you ever gotten to that point in a relationship where you started to feel like the woman you were dating was, well, boring? When you start to feel that way, it might make you begin to ponder the idea that she might not be right for you. Or, it might make you wonder about whether or not there is anything that you can do to get her to liven up a bit. Whatever it makes you feel, when you start to think that your girlfriend is kind of boring, you may want to start evaluating the relationship.
Here are 3 things that coming to the realization that your girlfriend is boring might suggest:
1. You may be spending too much time with her.
One of the ways in which the excitement of being with someone can quickly fade is when you end up spending too much time with that person. When you first start dating a woman, everything about her is brand new to you and so, each moment that you are with her, you are seeing a new side of her, etc. However, when you've been around her for a bit, there isn't so much that is brand new. If you end up spending too much time with her and there isn't much excitement, that can make you feel like she is really boring. Spending a little less time with your girlfriend might actually be a good idea in this case.
2. You and your girlfriend don't have much in common.
I remember this one woman that I dated a few years back. She was nice, she was really pretty, and we had absolutely NOTHING in common. So, yeah, after a little while - I was bored when I was around her. Because we didn't have the same interests in common, anything that she wanted to do was boring to me. And the reverse of that was true as well, anything that I wanted to do was boring to her. The reality was that we just were not meant to be with one another because we just didn't have much in common.
3. You need to start doing things that are exciting with one another.
Think about what you do when you spend time with your girlfriend. If it consists mostly of watching television together or sitting on the couch while you are both on separate laptops, then the solution may be that the two of you just need to start doing things that are exciting. Boring can easily end up eating away at a good relationship, and if you don't want that to happen, you might want to find something that you and her can do as a couple that will take away that boring feeling.