What Is Shyness and Why Are Some Men Shy Around Women?

Do you struggle to talk to women? If you find your face goes three shades of red and your normal voice turns to a stammering mess, you could be painfully shy around women! This can be a big barrier to meeting and dating women, so if you have been struggling to make a love connection it is time that your understood more about shyness and better yet how to overcome it.

What is shyness?

Shyness is that uncomfortable feeling you get when you approach or are approached by new people. The level of anxiety will differ from one person to the next, and in some cases, it can become debilitating. Generally, shyness is a mere personality trait, which can lead to difficulty finding a date but otherwise it does not affect day-to-day life.

Causes

What exactly causes one person to be painfully shy while others exude confidence and love to be a part of the social scene? Scientists and researchers have not nailed down an exact cause of shyness; however, they do have some interesting hypotheses. Some evidence suggests that shyness is at least partially genetic and directly related to fear and it has been noted that children who are more fearful tend to grow up to be shy adults. Of course, environment and raising are also factors in whether a person will be shy, or not.

Social Phobia

It is important to note that there is a difference between being shy and suffering from social phobias. In extreme cases, social anxiety becomes so severe a person may find themselves afraid to leave their home. This disorder is known as agoraphobia and is the most extreme of the anxiety spectrum.

Shy or Introverted?

Another common misconception is mistaking introversion for shyness. An introvert does not avoid social interaction due to fear or anxiety, but instead because they prefer their own company. Introverts tend to become energized by time spent alone, but become drained by social interactions. Some introverts may also be shy, but introversion and shyness are not interchangeable.

Men and Women

As you can see, being overly shy can cause a multitude of problems, not the least of which is difficulty finding a date. If you experience anxiety and fear every time you meet someone new, it is going to be very hard for you to work up the courage to ask a woman out on a date. Thankfully, there are ways to work on overcoming your social anxiety.

Defeating shyness is a process and depending on your level of anxiety it could be a long process, but well worth the trouble. Start by pushing the limits of your comfort zone, gently at first. Make it a goal to meet at least one new person by the end of the week, for example. The next time you are faced with an awkward social situation, attempt to push through the fear and initiate a conversation. It is also important to work on your self-confidence levels; this may mean initiating some self-improvement efforts.

Conclusion

Why are some men shy around women and others exude confidence? This personality trait is shaped by a variety of influences, not the least of which is your childhood and genetic makeup. All this does not mean, however, that you are condemned to a lifetime struggle; you can overcome shyness with just a little time and effort. Of course, if you are struggling with severe social anxiety or phobias you will want to consult a professional who can assess your anxiety levels and discuss with you the best treatment options.