online dating is no longer a last resort for meeting singles. It has become so prevalent that a recent study estimates 30% of marriages have come from meeting online. The global online dating market is about $4billion, and there are well over 1,000 sites. Because of its prevalence, online dating has given rise to many new sites, most often targeted to a specific niche (location, religion, interests, etc), and in many cases delivered as a mobile application.
If you are considering testing out some of these new dating sites -- and given that many are taking a new approach to online dating, doing so is wise -- here are five red flags, or things to watch out for on these sites:
1. Fake Profiles. This is a fairly common practice of new online dating sites, and the reason they do it is clear: no one wants to join a dating site with few members. So these sites will 'buy' profiles, often from other sites, in order to boost the appearance of more members. This is obviously deceptive to members, who may sign up thinking the site is larger than it is. They may also be surprised that none of their messages are being returned, and no one is writing to them.
So how can you tell if your dating site displays fake profiles? It's not easy. But if a new site suddenly has 5000 members, if the profiles are written generically, or if you have seen a very similar profile (or same photo) on another dating site, it might be telling.
2. Fake Members Messaging You. Similar to #1, this tactic is used by sites to keep you more engaged on the site by believing someone (usually attractive) is interested in you. It should be pretty easy to suss out if the message is fake or not -- when you respond, do you get a message back? Also, the way the message is written may be telling. If it is impersonal, it's more likely to be fake.
3. Sites trumpeting matching algorithms. This has worked well for some of the major players in the dating site industry, who use their algorithm as a marketing tool. However, whether you believe in the validity and effectiveness or not (many do not), it is unlikely that a brand new site will have 'cracked the code' for how to match people. It's more than likely that they are trying something new that MIGHT work, but is most likely not proven, and is being used largely for marketing.
4. Sites that ask for a credit card without giving you an idea of what the site is about. It's not unusual for dating sites to charge a fee; however, for a new site to do this, they need to be clear with potential members about what they are paying for. There should be a clear 'About us' or 'FAQ' section so members understand the mechanics of the website. Too often, sites give you no access unless you provide your payment information.
5. Sites that try to do too much. Dating sites often fall into the trap of trying to outdo their peers by promising the moon to members. Instead of sticking to a specific approach to matching people or bringing people together, these sites will pose 'guarantees', too-perfect seeming case studies, and the greatest scientific matching formula on earth. Be wary...it's unlikely the site is breaking any new ground.
Be sure to do your research before signing up for any site. Read the Terms of Use and any other legalese. It's best to join a site that is growing steadily, has a unique and appealing approach, and is honest and forthright with its members.
Online can be a terrific way to meet new people and form meaningful connections if done properly.
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