Are You Nervous Around Women?

Some people think that a woman's sense of smell is so powerful that she can actually scent fear. I mean literally.

This is not true, of course. Women can't literally smell fear, but they do have many other ways in which they can tell if a man is nervous - by his eye contact, his mannerisms, or that slight waver in his voice.

Let's face it, most women are not looking for a nervous Nellie. In fact, most women would rather be stuck alone in a desert than to try to coddle some basket case.

How to get around this? Bluff!

Don't try to bluff your way into making her think you're some kind of Don Juan, just act more self-confident and you will tend to feel that way. Give me a guy with just enough self-confidence to at least carry on a nice conversation and I am golden.

I don't automatically discount the guy who is a little tongue-tied or who takes a little time to work up the nerve to approach me from the other side of the room. In fact I think it's kind of cute. What's not cute as if he is still sitting in the corner an hour later. Or if he does manage to make it across the room and his efforts to spit out his first and last names are a test of patience.

So what is a nervous guy to do? Just take some advice on how to manage your approach from your friendly neighborhood busty blonde (that's me!).

Oh, and as for something that doesn't work in this situation...you know that advice they give to public speakers to deal with nervousness by picturing the audience in their underwear? Believe me, that would not work on a drop-dead gorgeous woman. If you thought you were stuttering already, try picturing that hot blonde in her lacy intimate wear and you might as well check out right now, bub.

So take a deep breath and slowly let it out. Square up your shoulders and suck in your gut. Remember that the first part of feeling confident is acting confident.

If you're not a born comic, then don't try to use lame jokes to break the ice. How do you know? If your opening line has made the last three women you approached groan, that might give you a good idea!

So what is a good opening line? How about "Hi, my name is John, it's good to meet you."

A handshake is not always expected, but if it is, such as when you're introduced at a party, here's some free advice (I hope I'm not kicked out of the Women's Secret Union for telling you this): Neither hold her hand as if it is brittle or try to show off your machoness with a bone crushing show of strength. Taking her hand gently, but not like a cold fish, is fine. An even more intimate way is by taking her hand in both of yours, while looking her in the eye and giving her a sincere, friendly smile at the same time.

So what about your nervousness? Just remember that women are nervous around you also. Just get over that first awkward feeling and you'll be good to go. You'll never know what beautiful music the two of you could have made together if you watch her walk away with the guy who had a backbone.

Remember, bluff it, and you just may be the one who gets to go home with her tonight, you lucky devil!

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