Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Adult Female Friendships: Friend or Foe?

Friendships with other women have the capacity to either enhance your life or hurt you. But we can navigate the intricate dynamics of relationships if we realize that God wants to use our friendships to help us and others to grow. Friendships "are accorded a key role in women's' lives as their self-perceptions are continuously formed in connection to others. They stretch us to become more authentic. Women tend to cherish their friendships while enduring an underlying destructiveness This makes me aware of a gradual increase of women being more unfriendly to other females thus creating an unhealthy society of women. I am calling for a new normal in our female relationships!

There are many theories to explain female disharmony and why women are fighting for identity in a male-dominated existence exclusive of how women develop in relation to each other into adults. Basically, women learn from an early age to expect support and nurturing from each other. We share and talk a lot which predisposes us to creating close, intimate relationships with each other. This is why our female friendships are so worthwhile. Unfortunately, these same relationships may leave us vulnerable when the friendship is over.

It seems the women who we have given an intimate part of ourselves to have a greater ability to hurt us versus our male relationships. There seems to be a relationship between feminism and self-labeling by women as our foundation for relationship building. It has been found there are generational differences in the way women perceive their identity. Feminist self-labeling has been identified as having two categories, weak feminists- women who embraced the feminist label and supported the attitudes and views of the movement although lacking the commitment; strong feminists- who had a shared ideology that united its members to form more cohesive, intimate relationships. There are also the non-feminists which might explain the lack of developing a feminist identity thus creating further discord.

In order to understand what I am saying feminism must be defined. The dictionary defines feminism as "the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes" but there are more definitions. While feminism might be seen as a political agenda for economic reform, it has always been based on thoughtful reflection about the construct of sexual differences and the dynamics in which these differences are enmeshed in relation to oppression and status. Associated with the biological characteristic are several negative psychological qualities implying that male bodies/minds are naturally suited to positions of power and women's are naturally suited to lesser positions.

I believe that each of us holds an investment in facilitating a more mindful consideration of others whether male or female. Women need relationships that will inspire us to live and behave authentically for the improvement of ourselves, our children, and the next generation of women. I have found that when women do something with their lives that is rewarding on many levels, they just aren't interested in being unfriendly to others. It seems that when women are content with what they do, they don't have as much interest in making others feel bad. I think that outward comparisons and judgments are an indication of our female insecurities within the greater society. This makes us wonder how we fit in and are we good enough. If we felt more secure in ourselves and accepted our body/mind we were given at birth rather than looking outside ourselves for validation, we would be more successful in our female relationships.

As an Addiction Therapist and Christian Life Coach, I feel women who are content with themselves and not so caught up in comparing have fewer issues and usually are the ones who make true friends thus having a solid support system. Women who self-label as feminist appear to be more likely to admit the existence of sexism and believe that women should work together in order to enact Godly change. - Acceptance of women based on being created in God's image. Loving our female selves and each other is the best Christian principle we can follow. By maintaining female friendships, we are able to experience a sense of self independent of one's role. If we, as women, could embrace the full extent of our innate power given by God and empower each other by loving ourselves and each other; there would be no disharmony. We are here to manifest love.

Personally, I am a Christian feminist because I love being a female, love other women, and endeavor to make the world a better place for all people. This is my authentic self created by God. "There are "friends" who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24). We need to learn how to trust in God to send Divine connections into our lives and base our relationships on that inner guidance.



This news article is brought to you by GAMING NEWS - where latest news are our top priority.

No comments:

Post a Comment