Finding Love Over 40

As children we continually are told love is found in fairy tales or it is gross. Hit our teenage years and we discover puppy love and love songs. We will cry over mix tapes when the relationships end and sob into our pillows, swearing we will die from the pain. We will not. By the time we are in our twenties, our hearts have probably been broken at least once but partying has probably taken our minds off of it. Once we hit our 30s we may even have been married and had children. So in our 40s, we have been on the roller-coaster ride of love for some time and are now a season ticket holder. Disillusion and even resentment may have seeped in there from time to time.

At 40 and over, our commitments and responsibilities are not the same as when we first started this emotional journey. Unfortunately some of us may even have been scarred by it. Being older also means being wiser however. We are now no longer the 15 year old who bawled their eyes out when their boyfriend or girlfriend would not go to the disco. After all the ups and downs of love and life, it is now we know what we want and need from a relationship. In order to find what we want in love, we need to know what we do not want. It is that simple.

The ability to love is something all people are born with and it is our life experiences that shape how we go about it. For a long time when a relationship has broken down we swear off love, and instead turn inwardly. Before long though our hearts mend and it is time to seek out a new and fresh connection. As human beings we are social animals who want to be with someone on some level.

Being 40 and over does not stop that. forty is not a barrier against love and the evidence is all about us; from Hollywood to our neighbours, every one anywhere is looking and finding love. Love can happen at any age but as you get older the person you are becomes more grounded and aware of the pitfalls and highs. Being open to love does not mean falling for the first person who shows you a slight smile, merely allows that to potentially happen.

Finding love over forty is not something we should be fearful about, we should be embracing it; after all we know the route now. It is just a matter of climbing on board with a new passenger and enjoying it this time.

There is far more time that there used to be. People are living much longer and healthier lives than ever before. Times are tough but people over forty now are on average better off financially than their mothers and fathers were. There is much more to do and see and transport links have improved beyond all recognition.

The only thing stopping people being successful over forty daters is their fear of rejection but typically there is someone out there for everyone you just have to kiss a few frogs before you get to prince or princess charming.