A sports journalist was interviewing Derek Jeter, who invited the writer to go through his myriad stacks of unread fan mail. Embracing the task with child-like delight, one letter in particular caught his attention: the newly crowned Ms. Universe humbly asking Derek for a date. Wow, talk about an inside scoop! Derek, however, was not impressed; his answer stunned the columnist.
"No way!" said Derek, "I am not going the Ms. Universe route ever again."
Again?
Poor Derek; it must be really tough dating gorgeous pageant winners and super models. Obviously, there must be quite a story behind his reluctance, regardless that is the kind of date most guys would die for. We all have egos, some bigger than others, and nothing strokes our sense of self like dating out of our league. So when we come across that really beautiful woman's profile on our chosen dating site, we are not like Derek; we desperately want to go that route and so we begin by sending the beauty an email.
And it is almost always going to fall on deaf ears. Truth is, about a hundred other guys - or more - are having the very same idea at the very same time. One woman I was privileged to date said she received over two-hundred sixty emails the very first day she signed onto a dating site. I just got lucky; most of those emails were deleted without being read. It would be impossible for a busy woman to read them all. Now, you might have good fortune also in this kind of situation, but I contend the majority of men will be happier and more successful if they maintain a reasonable approach in searching for dates.
As I have written many times, a man must assess himself honestly when looking to date. We secure dates of higher quality as we transform into better daters ourselves. Therefore, if a fellow cannot post a coherent sentence on his profile, why does he believe that gorgeous PhD would want to meet him at the museum? If a man is out of shape, what makes him think a fitness model wants to date him? And if a guy poses in front of the bathroom mirror wearing dirty t-shirts and cut-offs for his profile picture - which he takes with his cell phone - does he really think that sexy fashion designer is excited to join him at Starbucks?
A radical intervention of the dating profile will help a guy increase his prospects as well as the quality of his dates, provided it is an accurate reflection of his genuine self. Still, be reasonable when searching online. Don't be guilty of the "Shallow Hal Syndrome." The man who only messages "tens" yet strikes out ALL OF THE TIME should try contacting some nice girls who are sevens and eights, and if he still gets no satisfaction, then go for fives and sixes. In real life, those numbers are meaningless. The point is, go out and date, gain experience, and have some fun. Sure, sometimes it is better to cut losses and just stay home, but who wants to be alone all the time?
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